Have you ever fallen into the "why" trap with God? Why is my child sick? Why are You doing this to me? Why won't You heal him? Why do I have to live like this? Why is everything so hard? When will you hear me? What did I do to deserve this? Why me? Why us?

Every accusatory question is like scooping dirt from a hole you're trapped in, only to let more mud and water keep you stuck in wrong-thinking, legalistic living, and religious lies. Contrary to what so many Christians believe, God does not put sickness on people to teach them a lesson. Sickness can enter into people because we live in a fallen world, because Satan has been given an inroad through sin and strife or simply through an attack of evil over the body. Many misguided Christians believe that God allows sickness, difficulties, and trials in order to grow them or grow the people around them. 

In John 11:19-21, we see Martha hint her "why?" to Jesus after the death of her brother. "Many friends of Mary and Martha had come from the region to console them over the loss of their brother. And when Martha heard that Jesus was approaching the village, she went out to meet him, but Mary stayed in the house. Martha said to Jesus, 'My Lord, if only you had come sooner, my brother wouldn’t have died.'"

The implication here is: Where were you, Jesus? Why did you take so long? How could you leave us alone? Don't you love us? What did my brother do wrong that caused you to allow his death? How could you? I thought you loved us...

Fear and feelings of abandonment can penetrate our hearts and minds and cause us to be distant from the Lord, even accusing him falsely-which of course, is all part of Satan's deceptive plan. Have you ever dared to ask those questions of the Lord regarding your situation? I know I did. And if it wasn't consciously, certainly it was subconsciously. 

Yet when I heard the truth that God desires health and healing and wholeness, that it is His will, the first thing I had to do was repent! I had to turn from my false belief in a punishing, punitive God, one that would cause or create suffering in my child's life as a result of some shortcoming of mine. Realizing who He really was, I repented of the belief that He had some twisted lesson to teach me. I repented of my belief that the Lord was not healing him as a result of my not being or doing enough. And I had to turn to truth and acknowledge the goodness of the Lord over my life and that of my child. 

John 11:33 and 35 says, "Therefore, when Jesus saw her weeping, and the Jews who came with her weeping, He groaned in the spirit and was troubled...Jesus wept." 

I had to embrace the fact that God grieved with me every day that we experienced hardship and difficulty because of sensory processing issues that stole from my child's well-being and therefore stole from my family's wholeness. I had to understand the required faith necessary on my part, the faith in the goodness of the Lord, and combine it with the grace of the Lord in the finished work of the cross. I had to stop asking the Lord why and start proclaiming the good news of the gospel! Jesus carried it all to the cross, even sickness. 

Once I realized that Satan comes to steal, kill, and destroy, but Jesus Christ comes to bring life more abundantly (John 10:10) I could stop asking why. Putting the blame where it belonged, I finally could see the schemes of the enemy and how they had played out in our life. Then I could embrace my loving Father and begin thanking him for his grace, the power of the cross and the health, healing and wholeness it provided for my child (1 Peter 2:24). I allowed my gratitude to overflow, put my hope in the Father's promises and I combined my faith with the loving grace of his Son. Only then, when we recognized the Healer, did we meet healing face to face!