I’m so grateful for my husband, Isaac, the love of my life! We had an amazing journey in 2019 and saw God work miracles. Together we stepped into this incredible place of faith, trust, hope and goodness. Just like this picture...we left the “rocky mountains” of challenges, trials and sickness behind us and walked forward in love, truth and grace! I’m so grateful for our journey, the incredible joys and victories...and the way we’ve remained united in trials and challenges. God is our binding cord! My prayer is that through your journey with me, you too can be set free in your marriage and that healing will visit your home like a soft, comforting whisper or a loud, rushing wind. However it comes, may it be the pivot point that turns your heart back to His. And his.
Today I had an argument with my son, my teenager. It wasn't a big argument really, but I found myself irritated. He was making smoothies in the mini blender. As he was scooping in peanut butter, honey and milk, I became frustrated that he didn't know how to use the blender and was warning him that he could burn out the motor if he didn't add enough liquid to those ingredients. After he got it to a sticky paste-like texture he added frozen mangos! Because I was thinking there was no way the blender could handle the job, I poured in more milk. He got upset because I'd made it too liquidy, ruining his smoothie to no longer be thick like the ones at the smoothie place.
Suddenly realizing what in the world was happening, I just walked away laughing and shaking my head. Why is this even relevant here, you may be wondering? Well, when this same son was three years old, he had complained of a "hot" tongue one day when I gave him a bite of my peanut butter and jelly sandwich. I began noticing other health issues that alarmed me also. For example, whenever we went to a friend's house (who had a large hairy dog), his eyes got blood-shot red, and little raised dots formed on his face, like tiny hives. In addition to this, after a bowl of cereal, his face would flush and little pink dots formed around his mouth.
For these reasons, I'd taken him to an allergist where he tested positive for several food allergies (including milk and peanuts) as well as testing positive for a dog allergy and multiple trees and plants, etc. I'll never forget that day. The doctor and I had a conversation, then the nurse returned to go over the results with me. As she talked, she explained the medications she was putting in a brown paper bag, including an Epi-pen for the peanut allergy. That's an Epinephrine injection (shot to the thigh) for an emergency anaphylactic reaction (airway swelling that restricts breathing or closes the airway altogether)!
"But will he ever be able to have peanut butter? Can he grow out of this allergy?" I had asked, almost pleading for her answer to be a positive one.
"With peanuts, you never want to take a risk. One day, it may be a mild allergy, and the next, the mere smell could lead a person into anaphylactic shock." Her words sunk into my soul, instantly instilling fear and alarm.
I was shell-shocked as she escorted my three-year-old son and me to the counter with the billing receptionist. As I got into my car with the "sack lunch" bag of "goodies" which my son would now be taking, I cried silently, so as not to alert my son who was buckled in his car seat behind me.
Over the next ten years, he would battle those allergies along with his asthma, which included more "fixes" like inhalers, steroids, nebulizers, nasal sprays, daily pills, you name it.
So how could he eat a peanut butter smoothie with milk, you may be wondering? Only by the wonder-working-power of the Lord! In the last year and a half I've watched my son, a young teenager, walk out these allergies and symptoms with the boldest of bold faith. As a mom, those moments were not easy. Where my limited faith wanted to plunge the inhaler in his hand when he could hardly breathe, chest heaving, he'd tell me, "No mom. I don't need it."
When I asked him recently how he walked through the healing process with the Lord, he said he resisted the devil, and he fled. In James 4:7, it says, "Therefore submit to God. Resist the devil and he will flee from you." Like me, my son also repented in his heart and leaned into the goodness of the Lord, trusting Him with his very breath and his life. He resisted the devil with every action that echoed, "I am healed!" And the devil fled! May your faith arise as a mother! And may the faith of your children soar!
"And God said, 'Behold, I have given you every plant yielding seed that is on the face of all the earth, and every tree with seed in its fruit. You shall have them for food.'" Genesis 1:29 ESV
What foolishness to argue over the consistency of a peanut butter smoothie and whether or not it will burn up the motor in the blender. If necessary, I'll buy another blender! But, in Jesus name, my son, keep enjoying the goodness of the Lord. And you too, may you drink it up to overflowing! May you spread your faith-paste like peanut butter, onto every lying symptom, until they vanish in Jesus' name!
"Therefore God also has highly exalted Him and given Him the name which is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father." Phillippians 2:9-11
The name of Jesus is above every name, and that includes Sensory Processing Disorder, Autism, Asthma, Cerebral Palsy, food allergies, and the like! Not one single name can be exalted above THE name. Amen.
Some of the most cherished blessings of motherhood were stolen through sensory processing issues in my child: giving tender kisses and wiping tears.
I was shocked the very first time my son told me, "No mommy, don't wipe my tears," as he squeezed his eyes shut and touched his fingertips to his thumbs on both hands, holding them an inch from his face. He couldn't even wipe his own tears. It was heartbreaking and I was devastated as a mom to be stripped of this beautiful privilege to comfort my child.
I have run across people who justify the fact that their child has sensory issues, stating it's just a part of their life and should be accepted by all and accommodations made accordingly. Recently, I even heard it said these children are simply "neuro-diverse". Furthermore, moms who don't know our story have told me healing is impossible and we must receive these children for who they are, right where they are. They argue that acceptance is required of us, especially as mothers and parents, in order to offer and provide a safe place for the kids at home, so when they go into the bigger world, they are more prepared.
I don't argue that a safe place must be provided for these children. And mothers must grow their ability (with Jesus) to become capable to provide it, with patience and love. However, and I realize that for some this may be difficult to hear or take in, but I completely refuse to "accept" or "receive" the sensory symptoms that are stealing the life and personality of these children, not to mention torturing and agonizing the essence of motherhood. Though for some, this statement could be viewed as extreme, for others, I invite you to rejoice in it! Rejoice in the truth that God did NOT intend for your child to be inhibited in life. God does not set out to deny mothers the tender kisses they were, in fact, designed to give to their children. Our loving Father in Heaven did not design your child to find it painful for tears to be wiped from their face by the soft, compassionate touch of a mother.
I understand that for some, it can seem necessary to convince themselves (or hear the convincing arguments of others) that this is just the way it is, so don't set your heart on anything different. Don't hope, just cope and accept. Give in and deal with your child. This can seem like a "safe" place for your tender heart and hoping for anything else can feel too risky or fearful. Afterall, you may think, what if nothing changes?
On the contrary, mothers, I boldly say take heart! Lamentations 3:22 states: "The Lord’s loving kindnesses indeed never cease, for His compassions never fail." The Lord is just waiting for you to recognize His goodness and the power of the cross! Jesus took on every sickness, every disease, every ailment, everything that hinders a child from experiencing an abundant life, here and now, not just in heaven. See John 10:10, 2 Corinthians 1:20, Matthew 8:16-17.
"Then they cried to the Lord in their trouble, and He saved them from their distress.
He sent out his word and healed them; he rescued them from the grave.
Let them give thanks to the Lord for his unfailing love and his wonderful deeds for mankind. Let them sacrifice thank offerings and tell of His works with songs of joy."
Psalm 107:19-22
No one can convince me to "accept" the less-than-what-God-intended life and health for my children and others. His miraculous healing power in my son's body and in my mother's heart was His promise kept! Kissing those soft cheaks and wiping little boy tears are once again my joy restored!
I hope that you, too, will reconsider "acceptance" and step into a place of radical faith, believing in the goodness of God over your son or daughter, understanding that this sensory reactive life is not all there is. There's much, much more! A glorious goodness that only the Lord can restore! And in Jesus, he has done it! Reach and receive.
